Miss You – Wish you could come back

Dear Aatya,

Though it has been 7 years now since you left us all behind somehow I still feel your presence around. Whenever I come home, I feel you will be there in the kitchen cooking meal for us, watching your daily soaps or grinding baby food on millstones. Life has surely changed for all of us, the day you left this world. You were the homemaker, the one that connected us all together. Not a day passes by when you are not missed.

I wish you were here during didi’s wedding, I know your happiness would knew no bound. Since the day we were born, we three were more than niece to you. You were our second mother. I can imagine the excitement and glow on your face during her wedding and how you would enthusiastically participate in all the preparations. I still remember how much you loved to get dressed up. Time passes by so fast.

I still remember the time when I was crying so bad on my first day at school and you handed me a chocolate and convince me to go to school. Mummy could only work carefreely because she always had your back. You were there to look after us. Every morning you fed me breakfast, gave me a bath, took me to school and came back to pick me up.

It was your daily routine. I miss lying in your lap while watching TV. The time when you use to convince mom to buy me the toy I loved and when you even convinced didi to do my homework each time just because I gave excuses for not feeling well. You were always there for me like a guarding angel.The day when the doctor broke the news of your kidney failure hit us so hard. I can never forget the 15 days spent in that hospital.

I know you were scared a lot from inside but you fought it like a brave woman. All the dialysis procedures were slowly killing you inside and somewhere us too seeing you in all that pain. But nothing works before God’s will. I still remember the day before your death when you were sitting on the hospital bed. I was leaving for home and said you bye but you didn’t respond and I patted you and said you bye again but you ignored it. So I left but while going I just happened to turn back and I saw you smiling at me and waving bye. I smiled and waved back at you and left for home happily.

The next day when I came back from college I heard that your condition was critical. Without any second thoughts I was rushing to the hospital but on my way, I got the news that you could not make it up. I went blank in the middle of the road and start moaning. All the memories just flooded in. I remember the last night when you waved at me smilingly and I wish I could go back to that time and hug you back. That single memory still never fails to give me goosebumps. It was your last goodbye to me. I never imagined it would be so heartbreaking.

I know you are at peace now but a part of you will remain with us forever. I wish I could have you by my side always. I know you are looking at us from above and I hope I could make you proud someday. I Love you and I Miss you.

I just wanted to dedicate a song to you which always reminds me of you-

“You tucked me in, turn out the light

Kept me safe and sound at night

Little girls depend on things like that

Brushed my teeth and combed my hair

Had to drive me everywhere

You were always there when

I looked back

You had to do it all alone

Make a living and make a home

Must have been as hard as it could’ve been

And when I couldn’t sleep at night

Scared things wouldn’t turn out right

You were there to hold my hand and sing to me

Caterpillar in the tree

How you wonder who you’ll be

Can’t go far but you can always dream

Wish you may and wish you might

Don’t you worry, hold on tight

I promise you there will come a day

Butterfly fly away

Butterfly fly away

Butterfly fly away”


(Butterfly fly away – Song by Miley Cyrus)

Yours lovingly,

Vrushu

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